Mittens

Posted on 02 Mar 2024 @ 4:35pm by Ensign Lauri Gredun

“MITTENS!!!”

The sudden shriek sent a shock down Lauri’s spine to the point her entire body froze stiff. Slowly cranking her head like a clockwork marionette, her eyes fell to the direction of the sound. Eyes were instantly locked and a surprised gasp took shape over her expressions, juxtaposed only by the massive grin painted on her sister’s. But that moment lasted only so long as questions and thoughts of an incredibly awkward conversation flooded her mind, overwhelming any sense of longing. Instead, it forced her into flight, grasping onto final moments of innocuity as hopes of a quick getaway.

Of course, an escape only took place in her mind as soon, a pair of arms found itself wrapped around her thin waist and a chin rested on her shoulder.

“My, my… where are you running off to now Mittens? We haven’t seen you in years and this is how you greet us!?”

Lauri wiggled in place as she’s successfully captured. The grip felt like a vice and she desperately tried to free herself. “Hnnng… Irja, I-- How incredibly unexpected.” She belted out, head inching further away.

“It’s been over seven years baby sis, don’tchu think it’s about time we’ve met up?” Another voice chimed in as Lauri felt a pressure on the top of her head, an elbow placed as her older brother leaned down.

“So you came as well, huh?” She tried to look up but as her brother exerted more pressure, she slowly became a tiny square compacted by her two older siblings.

“Fine, fine! You lot win…” Lauri relented as she stopped struggles, though mostly having tired herself out. “Now can you please let me go? I’m not a child anymore…”

As per request, her sister loosened her grip and her brother took his elbow off her head. They still kept close, but now simply orbited around her like satellites, eyeing and studying her closely. Crossing her arms over her chest, Lauri glared back at the two. It has been over seven years since they’ve met face to face. Whilst parts of her were glad to finally see them, another resented the fact that it has been so long. They had their reasons of course, and she could only guess as to what. But to think they’ve left her all alone in the stars for so long only to decide now as a moment opportune for a reunion did nothing but cause a slow simmer.

“Well… we’ve never really thought we’d get this far.” Irja admitted.

“Aye, we thought you’d give us the slip or sometin’ by now, why it appears you’ve gone soft baby sis’.” Eliel gave her a playful punch on the shoulder.

Lauri rolled her eyes and stepped away, ducking underneath the two taller Trills so she may slink off faster than they can react. “If wasting my time was you lot’s operative desire, you’ve both done so swimmingly.” Pointed as usual, yet in that prickly voice of her’s lingered a level of gloom, one neither of the older Trills have ever heard before in their little sister. She was strange, exhibiting an uncanniness one can’t simply attribute to the passage of time.

“Hey wait a minute,” Irja asserted as she pulled Lauri back like a ragdoll, “We came all the way out here, the least you could do is let us treat you to dinner, hm?”

After a quick pause, she added: “I’ll even cook your favourite jellyfish stew, non-replicated, just like how it was back home.”

A stare of doubt made itself apparent across her face, the attempt at bribery far too obvious. “Oh please, even I know they don’t exactly allow export of--”

“Quit evadin’ baby sis!” Her brother moved to block her path before placing two large hands on her shoulder. Under any other circumstances, Lauri would’ve felt intimidated and compiled. But things had changed, now she just looked up, her eyes glazed over with an empty stare.

“Oh come now, it’ll be great fun! Just like before, hm? And besides… It's that time of year! What better way than to spend it with family?”

Those same pair of arms found itself around Lauri’s waist. This time however, they exerted a subtle push, as if inclining her to step forward. Letting out an exasperated sigh, she complied, giving her siblings free reign to take her wherever they wished. There wasn’t much she could do even if she wanted to toss these two aside and carry on with her previous engagements. She was tired after all, drained mentally to truly resist after her recent baptism. But perhaps she wouldn’t need to, at least not for another few hours before she’s called up for a bridge shift. They were her own blood after all and with how things have changed over the past month, this could very well be the last time they’re ever together.

***

“Mittens!!! Where’d you run off to? Supper’s ready, hm?” In the stillness of a calm afternoon, a call echoed throughout the valley.

Lauri’s little head snapped to the sound of the voice, to a modest cottage sat upon the crest of a hill. Her big sister stood by the threshold, a hand on her hip as she beckoned for her younger sibling’s return. Despite only being five years older, she felt more like a mother than a sister. Scampering to her feet, the young Trill diligently made her way back up the hill and into the cottage, back to the hearth of a tiny world she’s known for the entirety of her short life.

She was greeted by the usual sights; her sister stood over an ancient brick stove whilst her brother sat at a small wooden table, an assortment of books, papers, and pens strewn about. She had next to no conception of what he was doing, but it looked important. A smell floated in the air, potent yet incredibly familiar and one that made her mouth water. Despite that, this young and excitable girl had other plans than to savour the meal-to-be.

“Look what I brought!” She exclaimed as she plopped down some sort of creature onto the table, “I found him by the lake! He was hidin’ in some little hole. I don’t suppose that’s exactly healthy for little ones.”

“Tsk, and what do you know about what’s healthy for this ting?” Eliel quickly scooped up his items as the creature hopped about, croaking whilst its vocal sac inflated. “Maybe he likes it in that hole of his, maybe that hole was his home you just took him out of.”

A sheepish frown found itself over her face, followed by a pout characteristic of the age. Now plopping herself onto an adjacent chair, Lauri rested her head on the table as she stared at the creature, obliviously hopping about in this new world of giants. There was something analogous to this creature she couldn’t quite comprehend, but it was mesmerising and became the centre of her world for the briefest of moments.

“Right you two,” That same voice from before broke her concentration. “Clear the table. I didn’t spend all afternoon cooking just so some amphibian can pollute my stew.”

***

A familiar smell in an unfamiliar place. Familiar faces marred by her own eyes now gazing through differently coloured lenses. But the voices were the same, tonal inclinations touching the same notes as she remembered. It brought serenity even if lingering emotions painted them as strangers, beckoning her to abandon them to their strange feast. Suddenly a loud thud shook her ears, carrying her out of these temporary thoughts as her glassy eyes glanced up to her grinning big sister.

“Here we are!” Irja stood back, proud of the entire spread laid out before the two. “I couldn’t find some of the herbs and spices fresh, with what being all the way out here.”

Eliel was the first to start, quickly uttering a word of blessing and thanks. Lauri followed, but only after a protracted examination of the food. They looked decent, just as she remembered. It brought those fuzzy feelings, feelings she’s staved off over the past years out on the frontier as a means of making the homesickness pass easier. But after all that’s happened, these sentiments felt endearing. Perhaps they knew of her troubles or perhaps they didn’t. This could very well just be any other coincidence and not to mention, she wasn’t exactly worth the attention. Their infrequent calls over the last seven years said as much.

Her eyes floated between the two as she began nibbling on small bites of stew. A question lingered in her mind, one she eventually asked in a hushed whisper. “So why are you two here? Don’t you have some conglomerate to manage?”

“That ting takes care of itself.” Eleil explained between bites.

“Mother practically still runs it through her surrogates,” Irja took a seat shortly after, leaning an elbow on the table. “And we’ve already told you, Mittens! We came here just for you.”

She shook her head, “You know I know better. It’s not always so simple with you lot.”

Her sister snaked her way over to Lauri. “There may be a certain Ferengi that is the current chief operating officer of a certain corporation that we’ve been tasked wi-”

She held a finger up to her sister’s lips, directly to the point that it came as a surprise from the sudden touch. “Please stop. You know I can’t hear any of that.”

Irja leaned back, politely moving Lauri’s finger out of her face. “Of course, right, you’re still in that uniform of your’s! How could I forget?” She smiled, thinly with both her eyes and lips. “So I take it this is you accepting that previous explanation?”

Lauri shrugged, bites growing large. “I suppose so.”

Even if she wanted to suspend her beliefs to satisfy the gremlin of resentment that dwelled within, there came a point where the exhaustion it brought simply outweighed any sort of determination one had. Indeed exhausted was all she felt over the past week, it would be nice to lower her pretence and relax with those she loved.

“We also… heard what happened, mainly through rumours and the news.”

Lauri froze, the gears in her neck cranking to pivot her head towards her beloved sister. She called upon her usual responses. Yet at this moment, at the height of her exhaustion, met only by the warm smile of someone she can genuinely call family, her mustering attempts failed horribly. A quiet sigh was all that escaped her lips, the spoon she used returning to the table as she leaned her arms against the furniture. Slowly, she pressed her forehead against her hands, all the while Irja looked on with growing concern.

“How much do you know?” Lauri inquired, her gaze fixed on the now still bowl of stew.

“Enough to know you’ve most likely had it rough the past few weeks.”

“Yes, in some ways…”

The two now sat side by side, close enough for Irja to place an arm around her younger sibling. She searched for Lauri’s storm-grey eyes, only to find the tempest that once swirled transformed into a bitter hale.

It is well known amongst her kin that her little sister always had this streak of pessimism, one birthed from a youth filled with disappointment. Yet over the years, it seemed as if it simply disappeared, coinciding of course with this career of being a scientist and supposed ‘space-explorer’. Now it returned, like an ancient curse placed on the third-borne by a wicked deity, neverending and always lurking in the shadows of the mind. Unlike all those times before however, an eerie reflection ruptured from those tired eyes. The Borg, the Cube, this was no longer the child she raised.

“Oh Mittens…” Irja, on the verge of tears, leaned against Lauri in a sort of half-hug. “If only we’d known, we’d never have sent you away to the stars…”

Lauri shook her head as her eyes fell on Irja. Her voice hushed, the ever-present storm within the Trill seemingly subsiding for a moment. “You didn’t send me away,” She corrected, “This was my decision, I chose this life, yeah?” Her eyebrows suddenly furrowed, venom spewing from her mouth as the simmering overflowed. “My life, my consequences. I don’t need you to coddle me, not after seven years of practically nothing.”

“I-- Yes, and how are you dealing with said consequences?” Undeterred, Irja pressed further as she remained by her sister’s side.

A long pause hung in the air. That short, biting outburst was enough to satiate whatever was within for the time being, allowing Lauri to reflect. Has she even bothered to deal with the fallout or allow it to fester like usual? There were those conscious visits to the counsellor, developments in her personal life that acted as ways to fill the growing void but mostly, she kept to herself. She knew she was different than before, not wiser or more experienced but closer to being broken and worn. The light that once glinted from her eyes now dimmed and thoughts of discovery no longer excited her like before. The revelation had always been clawing at the back of her mind, but it wasn’t until now that they'd make it to the forefront.

“Not too well…” Lauri admitted as she slumped down onto the table. Soon a torrent took her by the throat and she choked, unable to speak. It was a unique feeling, though not unlike those times when one bid a final farewell to another that may only exist in the past.

Irja came closer, both arms wrapping around Lauri as she pulled her in. There wasn’t much resistance, her little sister became a ragdoll again, easily handled and near-lifeless save for silent sobs.

“There, there.” She gave her a tight squeeze, “You’re all right.”

“W-Why weren’t you here sooner?” Lauri managed a wet whimper as she pressed herself into Irja’s chest.

“Oh love… you know we wanted to.” She hugged her tighter, not wanting to let go of a little child she raised back into an unforgiving universe.

Lauri allowed Irja to hold her for an indiscernible moment. It felt nice, like a gentle campfire pitched in the midst of a pitch-black woods. It made her feel warm and as she basked in its glow, the monsters from beyond stayed away if only for a singular second. For the first time in weeks, she was able to breathe and found comfort. But that comfort was fleeting and soon, she felt the cold seep through the cracks. Arms that gave her warmth became hands, boney hands touched by frost. She felt herself slip, abandoned once more as she returned to the depth of the pines, fire snuffed where her only company was the darkness and the surrounding trees.

The moment was sweet while it lasted at least, despite having only been a tiny droplet in an otherwise incomprehensibly large ocean. Indeed a temporary respite was all that was afforded, a momentary rest before she carried on with this journey through the woods. Fortunately, she was growing familiar with this environment. Neuroplasticity has its ways of facilitating change and perhaps soon, even the cold and darkness will become companions through her long trek.

“You know we’re always here for you Lauri, no matter what.” Irja gave her a firm shake.

“Yes, I know…” She quietly replied, eyes turning away.

Irja reached a hand over to her sister’s forehead, brushing away a few strands of hair. Under the light, the strands looked as if they’ve turned grey, a stark contrast to the usual dark brown they all shared. Still, her lips curled into a smile, as if in admiration of a work of art. “Look at you now, all grown up. To think you used to be so small and helpless.” A sting of pain hung in Irja’s voice, as if in recognition of something forlorn. Lost forever to time, never to be retrieved ever again.

“I told you, I’m not a kid anymore,” Lauri smiled, a forced one but a smile regardless.

“I love you, Eliel loves you, yeah?” Irja placed her hand on Lauri’s head, giving her a series of pats.

“I know, I love you as well.”

Despite those words, they never found the opportunity to lock eyes again. Silently, she returned to eating, slowly slipping away and out of big sister’s grasp. She became distant like a far-away star, shining a light that’s only cold and blue; she was a stranger, even amongst family.

Things were ultimately different now even if neither wished for these changes. Those days when a small child ran eagerly back home with a strange creature retrieved from the lake were gone and all that remained was a grey-haired girl, wary and worn from her trek through the woods. Even if she longed for home, longed for those days of oblivious country idyll, she knew she could never truly go back.